Today is the day, the day I am going to again try to take control of my life! I have a facebook page in fact I have several pages. True to how I am in life I tend to also run from my social media life. I get angry, hurt, disappointed by something said on my page. Doesn’t really matter the reason why I do it, I just do it. I am a runner, not in the literal sense but from anything that makes me uncomfortable. My life makes me uncomfortable, my body makes me uncomfortable. I do not look people in the eye, I tend to stare straight ahead and actually caught myself twice walking away from my neighbor who is just genuinely a nice guy. I instantly judge that others are judging me. I created a secret persona on facebook awhile back, I do not want to hurt peoples feelings so I just created this secret lil area away from most everyone. I made a decision to change the name of that facebook person to Theresa – A Work in Progress. If you would like to follow and/or join me on this journey I can be found here https://www.facebook.com/TheresaWorkInProgress.
I know, I know I do this often, create new places on facebook. It is just another way of my running from things. I have seen a few amazing people blogging and attaching it to their facebook page as a way of keeping it honest and getting support. I plan on doing the same. I still have no plans to allow negative or non supportive people on my page. Bottom line is if you are not on a supporter of this journey than I just cannot have you as a facebook friend. I am surrounded by so many amazing wonderful women and a few men and I think we are all in this journey together so my goal in this is not about me but about us, as a group of wonderful people willing to share our ups and downs while going on this journey of discovery, not just weight loss but life epiphanies, struggles, ups and downs to mention a few. You are always welcome to tell people about it as long as their goal is to become, healthier and happier and support others in the process. A wise and wonderful friend said this to me yesterday “I’m not trying to be a size 3, I am trying to be a size free” that is my new motto. I hope to be inspired and inspire others, and who know perhaps we will all start a trend of inspiration, love and support.
I cannot promise I will not “run” but I promise to try my very best to not do that, to learn to see me as others do. As someone who is worthy of love and happiness, someone is so much more than a fat unhealthy unhappy woman. If you have read my past blogs you know my struggles, why I keep myself fat and single. But life is for living and that comes with ups and downs, happiness and sadness. I have survived 2 failed marriages, a rape, almost losing my son, the loss of my dad, the loss of friends, the loss of my self esteem and freedom to name a few. I have survived self imposed weight gain and keeping people at bay and you know what I am still standing, a bit crooked but still standing.
Today is the first day of my new improved journey. If you want to follow me that is awesome, you can do so on here as well as my new facebook. I did my first Curves workout. I learned a few things, I stink after exercising, I am really out of shape, it felt awesome, and never EVER workout with 5 shots of espresso and no food!!! Below are my stats for this new journey I am taking. I am also posting a link for this wonderful awesome inspiring man I hope I too can put pictures of myself in my process and not worry what others think. So here goes!!!
4/10/15 ~~ 278 wt / 58 bust / 52 waist / 57 abdomen / 52 hips / 26 thighs / 16 arms / body fat 47.7%
I have set a goal of participating in a marathon that is held in my home town. My goal is to walk in in September of 2016. I have friends who are going to join.