Change, Clean_Eating, climbin, Cravings, Exercise, Fear, forgiveness, Grateful, gratitude, Habit, Happiness, Journey to happiness, LIFE IS GOOD, Loss, Mindfulness, New Beginnings, Pain, Sadness, Uncategorized

Baby got Back…or will get Back!

I have had a lot of facebook memories popping up the last few months. Most involve having met my weight loss goal and the back issues I have had the last year or so. I got derailed, stopped blogging and lost sight of things. In my effort to get fit and lose weight I messed up my back and hip. I was walking 10-15 miles every single day for the better part of a year. I pushed myself, lost sight of the joy I had gotten from being out doors and was more obsessed with how fast and how far I could go. Having an addictive personality is a double edged sword.

Thus started my gaining 80 of the 120 I had lost. Losing the joy I had gained by being outdoors. Depression setting back in. Mostly non stop steroid for more than a year. I was lucky enough to find an amazing doctor who tried every single thing he could think of before sending me to another wonderful doctor. After more than a year of steroids and spinal shots they decided to do RFA. Basically they pinpoint which nerves are being pissy and they cauterize them. The hope is they will stop shooting pain signals to my brain. It is likely IF it is successful that I will need it done a time or two more to stop them regenerating. Success if usually 60% relief which 200% better than what I am having.

This is whole new path for me. The pain is vastly different in the last week. My butt cheek on the good side goes numb when I stand or walk. The good sides lower leg hurts and feels on fire. They did both sides but I still am a bit shocked at how the good side is the problem child right now. I have done a ton of research and the back feeling sunburned is normal and lasts a couple of weeks. I assume the butt and leg issue on the good side is just the pissing off of nerves that were only slightly mad. It is a rather interesting procedure but invasive so causes a lot of angry nerves! On the plus side the bad side is still somewhat numbed from the steroids etc so I am not feeling it on both sides….yet! It is a new journey, I have to strengthen my core… a core I do not have due to multiple surgeries. It weakens your back so it is essential to get a core and strengthen my back muscles or this has been for not.


Going forward is going to be about taking it slow and easy but consistently working on it. I am focusing on my eating again, doing small walks and exercises the therapist has given me. Today I decided to drive to get some organic veggies. I love wandering through looking at the different types of veggies and fruits they offer. They had these amazing beautiful flowers. I am forcing myself to enjoy the everyday beauty. Until I can get back to my hiking and the views it gives I have to find new kinds of pretty.

Yesterday on the way home from work I drove up to one of my favorite spots in the city. Mt. Tabor was so important to me when I was first walking and losing. It is this gorgeous oasis in the middle of our city. Yesterday I walked around the reservoir. Such a tiny little walk but was gorgeous and so quiet and felt oh so good! There was a British gent there who was reading, having tea and just chilling with his pup.

So here I am on a new venture with the same outcome hopes but a very different path. I started my journey on 7-20-2015. On 2-09-2018 I took a different fork in the path. Along with 2 friends we have decided to weigh every Friday at work, I will also measure and take a picture every other week. Being honest and sharing was so helpful to me last time I am going to do it again. So stats for the last 3 week are as follows…drum roll please….


  • Weight 265
  • Neck 15 1/2
  • Arm  L 15 1/2  R 15 1/2
  • Chest 51 1/2
  • Under bra 42
  • Waist 50
  • Hip 51 1/2
  • Thigh L 23  R 22 1/2
  • Calf L 14 1/2  R 14 3/4


  • Weight 259


  • Weight 257.5
  • Neck 15
  • Arm  L 15  R 15
  • Chest 51 1/2
  • Under bra 42
  • Waist 48 3/4
  • Hip 51
  • Thigh L 22 1/2  R 22 1/2
  • Calf L 14 1/2  R 14 3/4

I took a lot of pictures through the first year I lost all the weight. It is so telling way more than the scale. These are 2 weeks apart and you can see how cutting the carbs and eating more, drinking more water makes a difference in the bloat.


Here are some pictures from the first year. I like to keep it handy, it reminds me where I was, where I got and how I can get back there again. It was never really about the loss of pounds on the scale although I did become obsessed with it. It is about feeling good in my skin, being as healthy as I can be and being able to be active. 170109


  • Weight 253

So here I am back at square one but I have high hopes… hopes my back issues will get better, hopes my depression will ease, hopes I can hike again, hopes that even though I will stumble I will remember to always get back up



Day 6 ~~ 30 Day Challenge ~~ NOT AGAIN!!!!

For the second day in a row I have come home to a package in my mail! This one was from my aunt and uncle. I remember she had asked me for my address so she could send me some family tree information so was pretty excited to get it. Last year my uncle passed away, he was the last of the Tabor’s other than my sister and myself. Along with the family history she sent pictures that I had sent Bill and Eldamarie from when the kids were little. I have to say I am happy that our family tends to keep every photo ever sent, received or taken. Some of the pictures I do not remember even sending him.

One of the pictures was of my father and I at my sisters wedding, we are both smiling what appears to genuine smiles. Neither of us were much into smiling or having our pictures taken. I think this is the only picture I actually have that is just my father and I. He passed away 5 years ago so this means so much to me.


This is a picture of my Aunt Mena, Aunt Theresa, Kayla and myself, I had never seen it before.20150421_172636-1

Not sure what this picture was about but how handsome is my sweet dad!


This is from my sisters wedding, we always laugh about how much Levi’s hair used to glow when he was younger!20150421_172158-1

There was a picture of my precious Aunt Theresa and my dad


A picture of me as a baby!


Pictures of Levi and of me and his father with him, I am sure he has not seen these! Although we are divorced I am including them, he gave me these two amazing kids I owe him more than I can ever say.123 20150421_172331-1 20150421_172705-1 20150421_172733-1 20150421_172757-1 20150421_172817-1

Pictures of my adorable Kayla, who always thought she was adopted due to lack of pictures (2nd kid)20150421_172338-120150421_172811-1


This wonderful picture of my mom, dad, Levi, Brian (my nephew) and Kayla.


Add the package to the lunch of laughter with Lisa and Pam and despite working being overwhelming it was an incredibly good day. I did not make it to Curves like I had wanted but will tale a walk tonight so it is all good. AND I just checked my email and I have 5 more followers. I do not have as many as some bloggers but I am getting more and I am following most in return. They have many of the same struggles and some are just inspiring and others just make me laugh. One young girl started a bucket list, it is huge but she has checked off many of them, some seem unattainable but as she said, there is always a change it will happen. I am going to start my own. I love that a good chunk of hers are easy, silly, happy things. A bucket list does not have to be things that are once in a life time. They can be as simple as walking barefoot in a puddle or a pile of leaves. Stay tuned for my bucket list!


Hugs ~~ Theresa n-QUOTE-large570